The other morning I had to get up at 5:30 and drive into Vancouver for a early morning meeting. The thing I love the most about those early mornings on the bike is the fresh crisp touch to the morning. However, this morning in particular was clouded with fog which didn’t make for an easy ride. By the time I got to the Portman bridge on the Highway I couldn’t see anymore than 10 feet in front of me. As frightening as this was to be crossing one of the biggest bridges in Vancouver at 100 Kmh without seeing, I rode ahead with such confidence. It was then it struck me that this was such a clear parallel for where I am at in life right now. I have no idea what is in front of me and where I am going. I feel lost in the spiral of so many unknowns, the kind of place we usually describe as a free fall. But the mystery, the paradox that really intrigues me is that in that place, I feel so much confidence. As fast as everything in this world is moving and in my life, I just keep going ahead.

The more I thought about my metaphor to life, I explored how the whole situation hangs together. What I mean by that is what compels me to continue to drive 100kmh when I cant see ahead of me? It is trust. I trust that the car in front of me will not slam on their brakes. If they did, lets just hope for the best. So how does that relate to life?

I think our trust in God is critical for holding the unknowns together.

I have never been in a place in life like this clouded with so many paths, so many unknowns, so many transitions and so far away from…. just being me (for instance, the last time I blogged was in March). But the paradox is, which is actually shattering another one of my traditional Christian boxes, just because I am in this place in life, it doesn’t me that my trust or my faith is to be lost. If anything, I must admit it has been heightened. I couldn’t even begin to describe the amount of faith it took to cross that bridge in such dense fog! The unknowns; there were just so many - just like there are so many in my life right now.

So I feel I just continue ahead, not blinking to fear, but confidently riding in trust. This is right, this is good.

“And, of course, when you discover something like that and it’s like discovering a tooth with a missing filling. You have to probe it, work around it, push on it, think about it, not because it’s enjoyable but because it’s on your mind and it won’t get off your mind… Not to deliberately irritate him, but because the irritation seems symptomatic of something deeper, something under the surface that isn’t immediately apparent.” - Robert Pirsig, Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance